All I Wanted Was Someone To Care

Words Words
Bitch and whore
The girl runs away
she slams the door
she takes a knife
and cuts her skin
remembering how screwed up her life has been
she leans to the toilet
throws up to be thin
at school all she has is a grin
She cuts cuts cuts some more
Screaming in pain, blood on the floor
People call her emo people laugh at her face
But they haven’t even tried to be in her place
Her dad just died, her mom has depression
her brother has to go through a therapy session
Why can’t people see? that grin is a lie
everything’s done for her, her life’s slowly fading by
Bloods dripping on the floor, she’s screaming in pain
she can’t eat because that means more weight to gain
She wishes to be perfect she says it’s not fair
she says she hears people talking about her hair
She cuts it all off, her soul has been broken
but she never told anyone, her words were never spoken
She takes the rope, hangs herself in the dark
She no longer has a beating heart
Her friends fall to the ground
when they hear the word “She’s dead”
Her brother cries as he sleeps in her bed
She is gone
She is done
Just because of people. making fun.
She’s buried on a Saturday,
people start crying
all because that one girl stopped trying.

so before judging someone on their weight or their clothes
their laugh their talk their hair or their nose
Just take a moment to realize and see
Everyone is not always who they seem to be.

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Pain Pain Go Away

Pain, pain go away!
Please do not come back another day.
Tears falling down my face.
Oh, how I wish for his warm embrace.
Wonder if he cares about me.
Wonder if this is supposed to be.
How can he stand there and break my heart
How did we allow us to grow so far apart?
My dreams of us being happy is not going to come true.
All I am feeling is down and blue.
Pain, pain go away
bring me back to another day
where he loved me and
we thought we were meant to be.
I will not stop loving you, that much is true,
but I will be stronger in time
and not feel so blue.
you will always be in my heart
even when we are apart.
One day I will have that warm embrace
and tears will stop flowing down my face.
Pain, pain go away
leave me alone and do not stay.

How To Treat Your Wife

One you should treasure, but not as a possession,
Who needs to be loved, not treated with aggression.
Her value is more than all the world’s treasures,
Not just the sum of scale’s unit measures.
She should always be built up, not torn down,
By all the words you speak, when she is around.
She needs to be hugged and not pushed away,
Especially when you are both having a really bad day.
Words spoken to her in haste and anger
Can place her fragile heart in danger.
She should be admired for her boundless love,
And looked upon as a true gift from Above.
Not used as a target for all your frustration,
But held close and kissed with loving admiration.
You should always appreciate her commitment to you,
And not take for granted what she’s given up for you!
Kiss her and love her all that you possibly can,
And don’t be embarrassed to be seen holding her hand.
Treasure each day as if it were the last,
And at the end of your life you won’t be regretting your past.

Our Hearts Will Always Touch

When I laid there beside you,
Could you feel me there?
My arms were wrapped around you,
And I was stroking your hair.

I was talking about all the good times,
For me they were every single day.
I wanted you to feel love and comfort,
And happy in some way.

I watched your every breath,
And prayed that each one wasn’t your last.
The time we got to share together,
Went by too quick…Too fast.

I wanted you to wake up,
Please Mum…Open your eyes.
Tell me this is a nightmare,
And not our goodbyes.

As your last breath grew closer,
We lay there peacefully together.
My heart continually breaking,
Because I wanted you forever.

Then there it was,
Your final breath of air.
I didn’t want to believe it,
This is so cruel and not fair.

I held your beautiful face,
And prayed you’d breath again.
I wasn’t ready for you to go,
I couldn’t admit that this was the end.

But then I realized that you were now in peace,
And not suffering anymore.
You were beginning the life of an Angel,
And your body would no longer be sore.

I held you close and squeezed you tight,
And tried to say goodbye.
I’ve lost my Mum and my number one best friend,
All my heart could do is cry.

I slowly got up,
I wanted so much to stay.
I leaned over and gave you one more kiss,
It was so hard to walk away.

Mum, you are my entire world,
And I miss you so very much.
I wish I could feel your lovable cuddle,
And your soft and gentle touch.

But for now I have to wait,
Until we meet again.
You will always be in my heart and thoughts,
My dear Mum and best friend.

Always and Forever,
Our hearts will always touch.
Always and Forever,
Your baby girl loves you so much.

While I Was Bleeding

Where do I begin to explain the beating?
You watched as I sat there bleeding,
You never cared about my feeling.
My hurt had no healing.
Rape after rape I knew I had to escape,
never allowed to look up,
never allowed to talk..
Beat me so I couldn’t walk..
I remember the day I almost died,
you laughed, while I cried.
You beat me so bad while you cursed out my dad!
I could never withstand the pain, you are insane!
You played me like a game..
This time I win, and you, you have committed a sin..
When you burn in hell, which time will only tell,
god will ask you, “why, why the beating of this woman whom you took to love?
Did you forget who was watching from above?”
Remember when I hid under the bed from you, what was I suppose to do,
you kicked me in my tummy,
I lost our baby and you thought it was funny.
You degraded me and put me in dirt,
you loved to see me hurt.
Now that I have gotten away through my planned escape
I have no more tears or any fears but the memory will last for years.
God has blessed me and now I’m not afraid to see.
I am brave, brave enough to have a child now,
brave enough to have found marriage,
and brave enough to believe in love,
thanks to god above..

So Many Doors Of Pain

My mind is full of many doors
Where lots of secrets dwell.
Not many people get inside.
I’m scared they might just tell!

Door one was first established
A very long time ago.
I was only four to start with.
I guess I didn’t know.

By eight it had grown worse.
It hurt more than you could know.
I tried to stop and tell him.
He wouldn’t listen, though!

Many things happened
Behind this wooden door.
I learned to shut up and say nothing
So I couldn’t hurt anymore.

I was just young and small
What sort of fight could I give?
I lived a life of silence,
At times too scared to live.

Door two was small in comparison.
Just one event lives here,
Another horrid memory,
One fueled by lots of beer.

He came in one night mistaken.
At least that’s what I thought,
Until he wouldn’t go away.
Again, more pain he brought.

I can’t write what he did.
The word escapes my mind.
I just floated into dreamland
Until eventually he left me behind.

He came back within minutes.
Once obviously wasn’t okay.
I tried to tell him to stop and no,
But he wouldn’t go away.

I pretended it didn’t happen.
Went to school the very next day.
This door is heavy and solid,
Behind it this memory stays.

The third door is even bigger.
Betrayed by a best friend.
Again, the word no meant nothing.
It’s like it never ends!

There are other doors in there,
Although these are relatively small.
I often look for reasons.
Deep down aware there’s none at all!

It’s easier to blame myself.
That way there’s a reason.
However, shame and anger linger.
Tears may come this season.

These doors need to be opened
To make room inside my head.
I want it to be a happy place,
Not one that’s full of dread!

Free

Running…
but getting no where
you seem to be dragging 50 pound chains on each ankle
it seems the whole world is dragging you down
down to the depths of hell
where your soul will burn
where none of your cries will be heard
where your own mind
could be your own personal torture
stop thinking
stop running
this is your life
live it to the fullest
no regrets
and no worries
cause all it will do
is hold you back
this is my life
and i will live it the way i want to
free
for myself